Javen rises....to annoy the piss outta the Boss Ma'am
Mar 31, 2016 18:33:56 GMT
Alex Jones likes this
Post by Teh_Javen on Mar 31, 2016 18:33:56 GMT
Hey there errbody! Welcome to what should be just the beginning in a long line of promos streaming on the #ValentineWrestlingSyndicate website. My name is...well....erm this is kind of embarassing...I-uh- don't have a name actually. I'm just a guy who does narration in these deals. See normally I work for Javen's brother CM and narrate this kind of stuff. However since the older brother has wished his now former employer well in their future endeavors, I'm on loan to the rainbow-haired warrior. So, like I said, welcome to what should be just the first in plenty of promos to come over the following weeks!
Now folks we're not gonna be a buncha presumptionus lil primadonnas over here at Team Javen. No. We won't be assuming that everyone knows just who the hell "Javen" is. This will not be an introduction to him either; we believe that's better saved for the man himself. But we think its fairly safe to assume that all the fans eagerly anticipating Friday's pay per view have been following twitter.
Right?
Yeah, we thought so. Now alot of you, even admittedly Miss Valentine's assistant Nikki, likely think Javen is being a jackass. For days and days now he's been making lewd comments and such to the , as he calls her, "Boss Ma'am". Javen has made comments about her bosom, her backside, kissing her luscious lips, and smacking his hand on her rump just for a few examples. Most jobs? This is a surefire way of finding yourself on the unemployment line. But this is professional wrestling we're talking about here. The bosses of these companies tend to not handle employee punishment in simple ways.
*Shakes head no*
Instead the bosses you deal with in sports entertainment? They often tend to be some of the most vindictive people you'll ever meet in your lives! So it comes really as no shock that Miss Valentine would choose not to simply fire Javen for his comments. Nor is it so surprising that she'd put her husband, a decorated former champion in many companies, in position to punish her rebellious employee.
Again we can hear you and Nikki suggesting that Javen is being a fool then. But let us ask you all something....Give ya all a lil something to think about as we head into Javen's promo. Yes, he may be putting himself behind teh proverbial 8-ball here. He's gone an pissed off his boss. Yet look at where that's gotten him:
1) Javen has been a center of attention for Valentine Wrestling Syndicate.
2) He's main eventing the FIRST show for Valentine Wrestling Syndicate
3) While other names are signed and lost in the shuffle, Ana Valentine firmly knows Javen's at this point in time.
Keep that in mind yawl; ya know when ya think Javen the fool for his ways.
==============================================================
The scene draws open on a backyard setting in, presumably, Jackson, Tennessee. Birds are singing their happy lil songs while the sun brightens the day up with its brightness. As the camera pans we see a lawn being reclaimed from winter's grasp with vibrant green blades of grass....There's trees once again sprouting green leaves...And we come upon a back-porch/patio deal.
We hear the sounds of grass being walked on as our camera operator brings us over to the porch area. Heavy steps on the wodden steps indicate the operator of the camera is likely a male. Once he's on the porch we see some of the usual things you'd expect. There's a grill off in one corner of the porch....There's a small table with a couple chairs around it for a couple folks to get they grub on...
Then off to the far end of the porch is a couple lounge chairs. Between the chairs is a small, round table with a tall glass of southern sweet iced-tea.
A hand reaches out and wraps around the glass of sweet tea. The camera watching as the arm the hand is attached to draws the glass to the lips of Javen. He tilts the glass and ice clings against the sides as the liquid goodness pours over the rim and into his mouth.
The glass is tilted back to a level position and Javen swallows the big gulp of sweet tea. He lets out an "Ahh" in satisfaction before returning his glass to the small table. Now Javen, born Simon McMillion, wipes the back of the same hand across his mouth. He's sat up and noticed our obvious invasion of his relaxing late Thursday morning.
Javen: Well good morning there!
Came the younger McMillion brother's greeting to all you Valentine Wrestling Syndicate fans watching this online. He grinned and stood to his feet. Javen brushes his hands over his black shirt that read "Hey! Assbutt!" in white lettering above a molotov cocktail.
Javen: All you watching this at home, work, the bus, or wherever; yawl have no idea but I asked our camera jockey to meet me here in my backyard today.
He gestures and we again pan out over the fairly large yard.
Javen: What neither you, or him, know is why. But I don't want ya all worrying your pretty lil heads about the "Why". See ya pal Javen is about to drop some important knowledge on ya. Now fair warning folks there IS gonna be mentioning of past championships and the company in which they were won...
A pause from Javen. Its almost as if he suddenly heard millions groan out.
Javen: I know. I know! None of you really deep down think you care about what I did before and where in our lil business. But I promise you that its important to what's coming up tomorrow night at V-W-S' "March Madness" pay per view....that just so happens to take place officially in....April....
Its ok though folks, Javen is often this perplexed by the NCAA baketball tournament having its finals in April too. But anyway, he walks over to the edge of the porch and placed his hands on the railing surrounding the porch. Our camera dude moves for a side profile as Javen's begins.
Javen: For five years I was trapped on an island.....No wait, that's the opening for Arrow. Heh. My bad yawl.
The rainbow-haired fella laughed.
Javen: But seriously now, in the mid-to-late nineties, our bsuiness reached arguably its apex as an industry. People all over the world bought into the professional wrestling craze! Everybody you met could unexpecetdly be a closet wrestling fan. Hell alot of people stepped out of the shadows of those closets and revealed their love for our business. Everybody from actors and actresses to other world renown sports stars showed their loved. Business tycoons? They were not immune at all. Your lil kid's fourth grade school teacher? Wrestling fans! Your family doctor? Wrestling fan! Senators and other politicians that hated on wrestling? Wrestling fans mad cause their favorites weren't given a chance.
Javen motioned his hand as if to say "so on an so on"..
Javen: Not to be left out of the craze? Your everyday average American teenager. Ya see as the pandamonium of wrestling fandom swept the country? Teenagers actually found theirselves stepping away from their angsty shows like Dawsons Creek and into their backyards...
He smiled.
Javen: Teenagers all over this country began a movement known as "Backyard Wrestling". Now this wasn't exactly like all the cool matches you could see on your televisions every week. No the teenagers were really drawn to the "hardcore" style of wrestling. They loved it when folks just took a buncha weapons and beat the high-holy-hell out of one another! And thus the craz of "Backyard Wrestling" was born.
Now Javen turned to face us and the camera.
Javen: You're probably wonder what this has to really do with anything. Right? Well see as my brother would be happy to tell ya, he an I were born into this business. Our father was a promoter for a independent promotion down in San Antonio, Texas after years of work in Tennesse for other companies. Now my brother is a few years older and got his start first. Later on, when I was finally ready to do my thing, I got the call to start for the second company my brother prominently worked for: Professional Wrestling Today. PWT was based out of Grand Rapids, Michigan and had a pretty big following in the MSN territories.
Now every company that puts on a wrestling show has two options. They can do the same ole thing as everybody else, or try and find their own hook to stand out. Now this is in the early two thousands and people are still really loving the hardcore style. Nobody was really bitching about concussions and the shedding of blood so much. PWT wanted to attract those fans but at the same time be a lil bit different. Everybody had a "Hardcore" title. So in PWT it was called the "Backyard" title.
Ok....Cool story bro but.... point?
Javen: My point here is this: All the other wrestlers of the world? People like my opponent? They're always bragging about being the thirty-some-odd time World champion of the XYZ Wrestling Corporation of Awesomness! Myself?
A shrug.
Javen: I've always been in love with the hardcore style of wrestling.
He nods.
Javen: I enjoy the feeling of taking a chair and crashing it across someone's back! I love to grab someone and DDT them on a metal garbage can! I live to lay an opponent on a table, set up an climb a ladder, and then leap off driving myself through the opponent through the table! Yeah!
Javen exclaimed in excitement
Javen: There's few feelings in the world like when you take a kendo stick, left lovingly under the ring for no apparent reason, and whack your opponent over the top of their head! And oh boy do the fans love it when you spill blood. Ohhhhh do they love it!
He now rubbed his hands together.
Javen: And I gotta be honest with ya, I love to spill the blood of my opponents. But don't any of you sitting at home watching this get things twisted. I'm not afraid of pain. Naw baby. Where most men and women cower away from getting hurt? I'm all for it! If I get to hurt you and give the fans what they wanna see? I'm all for that! Cause ya see maybe I'm not like everyone else in their quests for world championships....Maybe I'm not looking to be the poster boy that a company really wants to get behind....But I am hungry for glory. And in the quest for glory that does not fade...though is may tarnish with blood....the pain I must endure to get there will always be temporary.
Javen cracked his neck.
Javen: Back in PWT, I held the Backyard championship on several occasions. Alongside a man simply known as Matlock, who was not an old detective, I am the name that is synonomus with that division. Hell I even innovated a match for the Backyard championship to be defended in every year at a pay per view event called "Caged Combat". Right now, in my home...
He motioned towards the house..
Javen: THE last version of the Backyard championship that PWT had is proudly displayed above my fireplace. The leather of the belt is faded and ripped in places....Its gold plate in the center is dented and stained with my blood, as well as the blood of several others. To me? That is MY version of a World championship. I paid for that in blood, sweat, and prolly years shaved off my life with some of the things I did in matches.
Once again Javen's body is racked by laughter. When he stops laughing there's a serious look upon his normally jovial face.
Javen: And the Boss Ma'am expects me to be what? Scared of this match with her husband? Repentent? Sorry? Apologetic? Bitch please!
He scoffed at the very notion.
Javen: I hate to break it to miss high an mighty, looking down on us from her throne, but I do *sorry*. Nuh-uh! Ya see yours truly here prefers to live in the moment! I speak...or in the case of twitter: type...what is on my mind. Now if you can't take a lil ribbing....Get over over a lil oggling....Deal withh some addmitted crude compliments....Well hey that's your problem sugar-tits!
A thought occurs to Javen though.
Javen: Well I guess now its also your husbands problem too. But what do you expect to happen? I'm not frightened because I have to face him in a no DQ match, Boss Ma'am. Hell I'm not frightened at all to be facing Alex Jones at March Madness tomorrow evening. In fact I look forward to facing your husband in that match Boss Ma'am; because everything I've heard makes me believe that its gonna be a hell of a match. The guy is what? Multiple times a world champion? Holds the honor of being in a Hall of Fame or two? Loves to fly in the ring like me? Oh I'm looking very forward to facing him and putting alot of smiles on the faces of all the fans out in Vegas.
Javen nods
Javen: Alex, I understand from the brief exchange we had on twitter that you didn't want this match at first. You're only in it because that bug got up your wife's ass when I made a few comments to her. I honestly didn't mean to put you in the position that you're in now. It has to be a lil bit more than annoying when something comes up an Ana points her finger and says "Sick 'em boy!". But something tells me she's a lil too high an mighty to dust off her boots and handle me herself...
A sly wink at the mention of the powerful Ana Valentine "handling" Javen. Oh yeah folks ya know where his mind is right now.
Javen: So its you an me Alex! Its the two of us that after everybody else has had a chance to showcase what they can do, we get to show the fans how its really done! And the best part about it is that stipulation of no silly lil disqualifications. Its pretty much anything goes! We can beat the hell out of each other with any and everything at our disposals. Its gonna.....be a blast! I can hardly wait to break a kendo stick or two over your head....smack ya around witha chair....put ya through some tables....hit ya with the monitors from the announce table....jump off a ladder onto ya! Man its gonna be so much fun to kick your ass in front of thousands of screaming fans, sending them home knowing they got their money's worth on that night. But do you know what the best part's gonna be?
We get beckoned in by Javen's finger.
Javen: The best part is that Ana tweeted her intentions to be at ringside. She thinks that she'll be out there watching you teach me some manners....or respect....or some other nineteen-fifties BS. But what she's actually doing is putting herself in the perfect position for me to lock eyes with her. Yeahhh I'm gonna stare right into her pretty eyes as I pin you and the ref slaps the mat three times. Its gonna be so much fun watching the mix of emotions that'll play on her beautiful face as my music plays and its my name announced as the winner of the first pay per view main event in the history of Valentine Wrestling Syndicate.
Ah such a sweet thought for our hero eh? He couldn't help but chuckle a bit.
Javen: Boy if you thought you were in the dog house with your wifey before.....
Javen leaves us to finish that thought for ourselves. And ya gotta wonder just how bad things will be for Alex Jones if he does fail to beat Javen? How will the lovely Ana act? What would she say or do? On the other hand it seems pretty unlikely Javen would "learn his lesson" even with a loss. So we could just be seeing the beginning of a long annoyance for the Boss Ma'am to deal with.
Now folks we're not gonna be a buncha presumptionus lil primadonnas over here at Team Javen. No. We won't be assuming that everyone knows just who the hell "Javen" is. This will not be an introduction to him either; we believe that's better saved for the man himself. But we think its fairly safe to assume that all the fans eagerly anticipating Friday's pay per view have been following twitter.
Right?
Yeah, we thought so. Now alot of you, even admittedly Miss Valentine's assistant Nikki, likely think Javen is being a jackass. For days and days now he's been making lewd comments and such to the , as he calls her, "Boss Ma'am". Javen has made comments about her bosom, her backside, kissing her luscious lips, and smacking his hand on her rump just for a few examples. Most jobs? This is a surefire way of finding yourself on the unemployment line. But this is professional wrestling we're talking about here. The bosses of these companies tend to not handle employee punishment in simple ways.
*Shakes head no*
Instead the bosses you deal with in sports entertainment? They often tend to be some of the most vindictive people you'll ever meet in your lives! So it comes really as no shock that Miss Valentine would choose not to simply fire Javen for his comments. Nor is it so surprising that she'd put her husband, a decorated former champion in many companies, in position to punish her rebellious employee.
Again we can hear you and Nikki suggesting that Javen is being a fool then. But let us ask you all something....Give ya all a lil something to think about as we head into Javen's promo. Yes, he may be putting himself behind teh proverbial 8-ball here. He's gone an pissed off his boss. Yet look at where that's gotten him:
1) Javen has been a center of attention for Valentine Wrestling Syndicate.
2) He's main eventing the FIRST show for Valentine Wrestling Syndicate
3) While other names are signed and lost in the shuffle, Ana Valentine firmly knows Javen's at this point in time.
Keep that in mind yawl; ya know when ya think Javen the fool for his ways.
==============================================================
The scene draws open on a backyard setting in, presumably, Jackson, Tennessee. Birds are singing their happy lil songs while the sun brightens the day up with its brightness. As the camera pans we see a lawn being reclaimed from winter's grasp with vibrant green blades of grass....There's trees once again sprouting green leaves...And we come upon a back-porch/patio deal.
We hear the sounds of grass being walked on as our camera operator brings us over to the porch area. Heavy steps on the wodden steps indicate the operator of the camera is likely a male. Once he's on the porch we see some of the usual things you'd expect. There's a grill off in one corner of the porch....There's a small table with a couple chairs around it for a couple folks to get they grub on...
Then off to the far end of the porch is a couple lounge chairs. Between the chairs is a small, round table with a tall glass of southern sweet iced-tea.
A hand reaches out and wraps around the glass of sweet tea. The camera watching as the arm the hand is attached to draws the glass to the lips of Javen. He tilts the glass and ice clings against the sides as the liquid goodness pours over the rim and into his mouth.
The glass is tilted back to a level position and Javen swallows the big gulp of sweet tea. He lets out an "Ahh" in satisfaction before returning his glass to the small table. Now Javen, born Simon McMillion, wipes the back of the same hand across his mouth. He's sat up and noticed our obvious invasion of his relaxing late Thursday morning.
Javen: Well good morning there!
Came the younger McMillion brother's greeting to all you Valentine Wrestling Syndicate fans watching this online. He grinned and stood to his feet. Javen brushes his hands over his black shirt that read "Hey! Assbutt!" in white lettering above a molotov cocktail.
Javen: All you watching this at home, work, the bus, or wherever; yawl have no idea but I asked our camera jockey to meet me here in my backyard today.
He gestures and we again pan out over the fairly large yard.
Javen: What neither you, or him, know is why. But I don't want ya all worrying your pretty lil heads about the "Why". See ya pal Javen is about to drop some important knowledge on ya. Now fair warning folks there IS gonna be mentioning of past championships and the company in which they were won...
A pause from Javen. Its almost as if he suddenly heard millions groan out.
Javen: I know. I know! None of you really deep down think you care about what I did before and where in our lil business. But I promise you that its important to what's coming up tomorrow night at V-W-S' "March Madness" pay per view....that just so happens to take place officially in....April....
Its ok though folks, Javen is often this perplexed by the NCAA baketball tournament having its finals in April too. But anyway, he walks over to the edge of the porch and placed his hands on the railing surrounding the porch. Our camera dude moves for a side profile as Javen's begins.
Javen: For five years I was trapped on an island.....No wait, that's the opening for Arrow. Heh. My bad yawl.
The rainbow-haired fella laughed.
Javen: But seriously now, in the mid-to-late nineties, our bsuiness reached arguably its apex as an industry. People all over the world bought into the professional wrestling craze! Everybody you met could unexpecetdly be a closet wrestling fan. Hell alot of people stepped out of the shadows of those closets and revealed their love for our business. Everybody from actors and actresses to other world renown sports stars showed their loved. Business tycoons? They were not immune at all. Your lil kid's fourth grade school teacher? Wrestling fans! Your family doctor? Wrestling fan! Senators and other politicians that hated on wrestling? Wrestling fans mad cause their favorites weren't given a chance.
Javen motioned his hand as if to say "so on an so on"..
Javen: Not to be left out of the craze? Your everyday average American teenager. Ya see as the pandamonium of wrestling fandom swept the country? Teenagers actually found theirselves stepping away from their angsty shows like Dawsons Creek and into their backyards...
He smiled.
Javen: Teenagers all over this country began a movement known as "Backyard Wrestling". Now this wasn't exactly like all the cool matches you could see on your televisions every week. No the teenagers were really drawn to the "hardcore" style of wrestling. They loved it when folks just took a buncha weapons and beat the high-holy-hell out of one another! And thus the craz of "Backyard Wrestling" was born.
Now Javen turned to face us and the camera.
Javen: You're probably wonder what this has to really do with anything. Right? Well see as my brother would be happy to tell ya, he an I were born into this business. Our father was a promoter for a independent promotion down in San Antonio, Texas after years of work in Tennesse for other companies. Now my brother is a few years older and got his start first. Later on, when I was finally ready to do my thing, I got the call to start for the second company my brother prominently worked for: Professional Wrestling Today. PWT was based out of Grand Rapids, Michigan and had a pretty big following in the MSN territories.
Now every company that puts on a wrestling show has two options. They can do the same ole thing as everybody else, or try and find their own hook to stand out. Now this is in the early two thousands and people are still really loving the hardcore style. Nobody was really bitching about concussions and the shedding of blood so much. PWT wanted to attract those fans but at the same time be a lil bit different. Everybody had a "Hardcore" title. So in PWT it was called the "Backyard" title.
Ok....Cool story bro but.... point?
Javen: My point here is this: All the other wrestlers of the world? People like my opponent? They're always bragging about being the thirty-some-odd time World champion of the XYZ Wrestling Corporation of Awesomness! Myself?
A shrug.
Javen: I've always been in love with the hardcore style of wrestling.
He nods.
Javen: I enjoy the feeling of taking a chair and crashing it across someone's back! I love to grab someone and DDT them on a metal garbage can! I live to lay an opponent on a table, set up an climb a ladder, and then leap off driving myself through the opponent through the table! Yeah!
Javen exclaimed in excitement
Javen: There's few feelings in the world like when you take a kendo stick, left lovingly under the ring for no apparent reason, and whack your opponent over the top of their head! And oh boy do the fans love it when you spill blood. Ohhhhh do they love it!
He now rubbed his hands together.
Javen: And I gotta be honest with ya, I love to spill the blood of my opponents. But don't any of you sitting at home watching this get things twisted. I'm not afraid of pain. Naw baby. Where most men and women cower away from getting hurt? I'm all for it! If I get to hurt you and give the fans what they wanna see? I'm all for that! Cause ya see maybe I'm not like everyone else in their quests for world championships....Maybe I'm not looking to be the poster boy that a company really wants to get behind....But I am hungry for glory. And in the quest for glory that does not fade...though is may tarnish with blood....the pain I must endure to get there will always be temporary.
Javen cracked his neck.
Javen: Back in PWT, I held the Backyard championship on several occasions. Alongside a man simply known as Matlock, who was not an old detective, I am the name that is synonomus with that division. Hell I even innovated a match for the Backyard championship to be defended in every year at a pay per view event called "Caged Combat". Right now, in my home...
He motioned towards the house..
Javen: THE last version of the Backyard championship that PWT had is proudly displayed above my fireplace. The leather of the belt is faded and ripped in places....Its gold plate in the center is dented and stained with my blood, as well as the blood of several others. To me? That is MY version of a World championship. I paid for that in blood, sweat, and prolly years shaved off my life with some of the things I did in matches.
Once again Javen's body is racked by laughter. When he stops laughing there's a serious look upon his normally jovial face.
Javen: And the Boss Ma'am expects me to be what? Scared of this match with her husband? Repentent? Sorry? Apologetic? Bitch please!
He scoffed at the very notion.
Javen: I hate to break it to miss high an mighty, looking down on us from her throne, but I do *sorry*. Nuh-uh! Ya see yours truly here prefers to live in the moment! I speak...or in the case of twitter: type...what is on my mind. Now if you can't take a lil ribbing....Get over over a lil oggling....Deal withh some addmitted crude compliments....Well hey that's your problem sugar-tits!
A thought occurs to Javen though.
Javen: Well I guess now its also your husbands problem too. But what do you expect to happen? I'm not frightened because I have to face him in a no DQ match, Boss Ma'am. Hell I'm not frightened at all to be facing Alex Jones at March Madness tomorrow evening. In fact I look forward to facing your husband in that match Boss Ma'am; because everything I've heard makes me believe that its gonna be a hell of a match. The guy is what? Multiple times a world champion? Holds the honor of being in a Hall of Fame or two? Loves to fly in the ring like me? Oh I'm looking very forward to facing him and putting alot of smiles on the faces of all the fans out in Vegas.
Javen nods
Javen: Alex, I understand from the brief exchange we had on twitter that you didn't want this match at first. You're only in it because that bug got up your wife's ass when I made a few comments to her. I honestly didn't mean to put you in the position that you're in now. It has to be a lil bit more than annoying when something comes up an Ana points her finger and says "Sick 'em boy!". But something tells me she's a lil too high an mighty to dust off her boots and handle me herself...
A sly wink at the mention of the powerful Ana Valentine "handling" Javen. Oh yeah folks ya know where his mind is right now.
Javen: So its you an me Alex! Its the two of us that after everybody else has had a chance to showcase what they can do, we get to show the fans how its really done! And the best part about it is that stipulation of no silly lil disqualifications. Its pretty much anything goes! We can beat the hell out of each other with any and everything at our disposals. Its gonna.....be a blast! I can hardly wait to break a kendo stick or two over your head....smack ya around witha chair....put ya through some tables....hit ya with the monitors from the announce table....jump off a ladder onto ya! Man its gonna be so much fun to kick your ass in front of thousands of screaming fans, sending them home knowing they got their money's worth on that night. But do you know what the best part's gonna be?
We get beckoned in by Javen's finger.
Javen: The best part is that Ana tweeted her intentions to be at ringside. She thinks that she'll be out there watching you teach me some manners....or respect....or some other nineteen-fifties BS. But what she's actually doing is putting herself in the perfect position for me to lock eyes with her. Yeahhh I'm gonna stare right into her pretty eyes as I pin you and the ref slaps the mat three times. Its gonna be so much fun watching the mix of emotions that'll play on her beautiful face as my music plays and its my name announced as the winner of the first pay per view main event in the history of Valentine Wrestling Syndicate.
Ah such a sweet thought for our hero eh? He couldn't help but chuckle a bit.
Javen: Boy if you thought you were in the dog house with your wifey before.....
Javen leaves us to finish that thought for ourselves. And ya gotta wonder just how bad things will be for Alex Jones if he does fail to beat Javen? How will the lovely Ana act? What would she say or do? On the other hand it seems pretty unlikely Javen would "learn his lesson" even with a loss. So we could just be seeing the beginning of a long annoyance for the Boss Ma'am to deal with.