Post by Teh_Javen on Apr 11, 2016 21:17:40 GMT
Why hello there you wonderful members of our viewing audience! It tis once again *I*, your narrator for the non-verbal stuff of this promo. How lovely to see you all back again anxiously awaiting our next installment. And we'll be happy to get ya into the awaiting promo shortly indeed. We'd be remiss though if we didn't first speak about "March Madness"!
Folks could there have been a better beginning for the Valentine Wrestling Syndicate? Could we have seen a stronger foundation of excellence lain for a new company? Honestly, we think not. Each and every match on that card was chock-full of high class competition! In fact if you look at the week in which "March Madness" took place for Valentine Wrestling Syndicate? You'll not find a better wrestling card out there. To paraphrase a big star(brother): Whether ya like it or ya don't, the VWS is the best thing going today!
Looking back now, "March Madness" as fresh in our minds as Fear The Walking Dead's 2nd season premiere last night, its clear to see that one match stood out above them all. Yes. We are indeed talking Javen versus Alex Jones. It was the main event of the evening! The match that was flashing on the marquee to entice the masses that hadn't already planted their butts in the arena seats. And folks that match lived up to everything we thought it would be!
Javen came out doing what he does, flying high, taking a beating, and still finding a way to press on. Alex Jones? Yawl that man is as legit as they come. He has a reputation of being one tough hombre himself. Take it from us, that is a well deserved reputation. Alex beat on Javen like the rainbow-haired warrior owed him money. Cunning. Jones was a cunning man; attemtping to use Javen's apparent infatuation with Ana Valentine to his advantage. But like we've said, Javen fought on. He managed to overcome the distraction and picked up the victory!
Yeah they say that you can't winn 'em all if ya don't win the first one....Guess ole Javen has a shot now don't he.
Or....Wait....Does he? This week on the debut edition of Tuesday Night Tenacity, Javen finds himself in a tag team match. And that's nothing knew to Javen. He's worked his share of tag matches over his career. But we, and he, can't help but be suspicious over the title of said tag team match: "Ana Valentine's Totally and Completely Fair Tag Match That Javen Can Win". Yeah. Uh huh.
*Insert an incredolus look right here*
Call us crazy here on Team Javen, but we ain't buying it when ya need to put it in a tag line that Javen has a fair shot. See nobody watching this is a fool. Everybody knows that Alex Jones has been blowing steam like an angry Fat Majin Buu ever since losing to Javen. Word has it that a Red lantern power ring skipped Alex because he had too much rage about that loss. So we know that he's gonna be looking for some real payback as soon as possible. Like...maybe...Tuesday night?
*Shrug*
Ask us, we think that at some point (if Alex even appears at all) Jones will abandon Javen to the clutches of Avery Miles III and Gabriel Ellis. Then after a valiant effort that will most likely prove futile, Javen will fall to the two on one handicap. Oh and then Alex will find the courage to run down and pummel the man.
Ok that's fine an all Alex. You an Ana are to be congratulated on this almost foolproof plan. But we recieved word for Javen earlier. He wanted us to make sure and remind yawl what one of the defining moments of "March Madness" was: Javen and Ana locking lips on the ring apron!
Folks enjoy this incoming Javen promo.
This late morning the scene draws open on a shot of Javen right away. He's hunched forward in a plain folding-metal chair, arms from his elbows to his wrists on a card table. In his hands Javen has grasped a singular, at our best guess, playing card. There's currently no way for us to tell just what card it is that Javen has in his hands. We can, though, see that Javen is eyeing his card intently. He almost seems oblivious to the fact his long, skittles-rainbow hair has fallen to either side of his face. To be honest its a lil bit questionable if Javen has even noticed the camera and its operator's presence.
After several, seemingly long, moments of watching Javen gaze at that card? He lays it face down on the table still denying us a glimpse of what it is. Seconds barely tick away before he's prying the top half of the card up again. Perhaps checking to see if it magically changed? Maybe Cris Angel is still about somewhere.
With a deep sigh Javen finally laid the card flat again. His gaze rising from the table and meeting the camera, finally.
Javen: Back on the first of this month.....April the first, commonly known as "April Fools Day"....the Valentine Wrestling Syndicate began building a legacy with its first pay per view event. Somehow...
Javen chuckled.
Javen: Somehow we managed to call the event "March Madness" and not get sued outta business by the NCAA college basketball people. Personally I think Ana Valentine's huge bosom had alot to do with it. But I digress from those massive topics for now. Back to the one I was talking about already; the building of this company's legacy. Ya see the fans who showed up at the T-Mobile arena in beautiful Las Vegas? They did not turn out to be hapless victims of a prank. Naw...
He shook his head "No".
Javen: Instead everybody went out there on that card and laid it out there for a chance at glory. The members of this roster beat the living HELL outta one another to start their careers here with a check in the win column. I may different in alot of ways from the vast majority of them, but wanting to be a success is one thing I can safely say I have in common with my peers. And so in the main event of "March Madness" I went out to the ring and I let this lil rainbow-colored light of mine shine!
Oh yeah folks, we all know that to be fact. Javen did just as he's done all his career, leaving no chance untaken in the quest for victory and entertainment of his fans.
He grinned now.
Javen: In the wake of my success I seemed to have made an April Fool of one mister Alex Jones; husband of the Boss Ma'am. See from what I gathered....after my head quit spinning and I could twist my back after that chair shot...
Did ya think Javen had forgotten that Ana? Trust us, he did not.
Javen: Seems that Ana an her lil snookum-wookums had a planned all worked out. Alex was supposed to make quick work of me and then go on to meet Gabriel Ellis for World championship in a few short weeks. Not to mention he was supposed to teach me a few random lessons in respecting our boss and his wife. Well folks if ya missed the pay per view; long story shortened down is that it didn't happen that way.
He holds up a finger an wags it back an forth.
Javen: That isn't saying that Alex Jones didn't bring it. Naw. Not in the least am I muttering that kinda lie. That man is a hard-hitting son of a bitch! Everytime he hit me it was what I'd imagine a jellyfish sting feels like. But at the end of the night.....When the dust settled....*I* was the victor. Not Alex Jones, but Javen!
Javen held out his left hand. Three times he slapped the back of his right hand against the palm of his left.
Javen: One, two, three and the ref was holding my hand in the air. After his flapping those gums about how he was gonna handle me and teach me respect? Alex Jones couldn't get the job done. Which by the way Ana was kissing me back in our lip-lock? Makes me wonder if the ring is the only place he hadn't gotten it done in that past twenty-four hour period.
There was a sly expression on Javen's face. The way they were positioned and the way the camera was? Who can really say if Javen is telling the truth? Yeah, of course, Ana would say otherwise. She couldn't just admit that she enjoyed a kiss from a man not her husband! Yo and maybe Javen was just stirring it up. Fact of the matter is we couldn't get a perfect shot. Think about it.
Javen: Ah but as is often the case for me; I seem to have really stepped into it this time.
Javen laughed again, though this one had more a nervous or anxious feel to it.
Javen: Couple weeks later and look where I've gotten myself huh? Yours truly got the win, made out with Ana, AND got added to the World title match coming up. True enough indeed. But I've found myself sitting all alone as "Public Enemy Number One" for the Boss Ma'am and her boytoy-hubby.
Words like this prolly aren't helping...
Javen: And now I find myself in a so-called tag team match. Folks a match, no less, in where my opponents are the incredibly talented Avery Miles the Third and Gabriel Ellis. Ha! Listen anybody who's anybody has heard about and googled an AM3 match lately. The man moves about a wrestling ring with the greatest of ease. Watching him do his thing is like watching Da Vinci paint or invent, its pure brilliance! And we ain't even made it to Avery's partner.
Lets talk a lil bit about Gabriel Ellis. This dude is seven feet tall, and rumor is that you can't teach that. Neither can you teach what he did at "March Madness". Stepping into the ring as one of five men in an elimination match? Its kinda ballsy accepting a challenge like that in the first place. I mean with the level of competition here? Just a single opponent is tough enough. But our resident giant Gabriel waded through FOUR to earn a spot in the upcoming World championship match. Including Duke Andrews who I've known personally for years, and Avery Miles.
A pause here as Javen begins to stroke his chin.
Javen: As great as my opponents are? Listen I *know* that this match is win-nable. Other guys who love to fly around? Psssh! My longtime fans know I'm cool with that. Its kinda my deal too. All the fans of the Valentine Wrestling Syndicate saw a taste at "March Madness". So I know good an well that I can best Avery.
Likewise, though I'm impressed by Gabriel, I am NOT intimidated by him. Yeah he's a big bad, ass-kicking machine! The guy might just stomp mud-ponds instead of puddles to walk dry. But I can deal with that. See ole A-M-Cubed is right that our business is not entirely a forest full of those big Ent-like bastards anymore. Still though I've dealt with enough of them in my time. I'll chop his big ass down like George Washington in a cherry orchard.
Javen was standing now. Yet after his boasting and bragging he looks down at his card lain upon the table face down.
Javen: But I ain't gonna lie to ya folks, this match is gonna be one of the toughest challenges I'll face from now til the end of my career here. See earlier I said this was a "so-called" tag team match. At this point I'm sure ya all know why I say that. I mean the silly lil tagline for the match itself? Look a blind man can see what the likely plan is. Alex, ya either don't show up or ya abandon me mid-match. I go on and give A-M-Cubed and the lost Ent a hell of a match. But being a realist at times I highly doubt I could overcome those odds. So once I'm worn down from facing two of our best, here you come charging down to get a lil bit 'o that sweet sweet retribution. Right Alex? Am I on the right track here?
He looked as if Alex would pop up an answer. It was ok that he didn't though. Javen was pretty sure of this. Plus if Alex did show up Javen would put him through the card table. But lets move on...
Javen: So....yeah, I'm boned in this match....
He reached out and put a finger on the card.
Javen: Unless! This one an only card I have here to play works Alex. See this card I'm playing its a man-card. If ya go rummage through Ana's purse ya might find yours somewhere in there. An I honestly hope that ya do Alex. Because ya see man this match is set up by yawl as a way to get at me, but it could cost you as well.
A nod.
Javen: Look at what happened at the end of "March Madness" would ya! You an Ana looked to cruise yourself right on into a title shot. However yawl got a reality check and found out full controlling interest wasn't in your favor. There's some more power players 'round here! And they're bound and determined to see that these great fans get the best they can have. Its what they deserve!
Now you can sit around and rest on your ass from what you've done elsewhere in the past....Coast along on your lil cushy reputation. Or you can man up! Take the balls out of your man-purse and stuff 'em back in your trunks! Show the fans just who the hell Alex Jones really is! For one night forget about our lil petty squabble, forget that I kissed your wife....and beat you....and got put into your World title match mathimatically lessening your chances of winning. Forget all that!
Javen made a motion as if wiping the slate clean.
Javen: Be a true blue competitor and for ONE night! Just a single night have my back in that ring. Be my partner and the two of us will soar to victory over our opponents. You an I can build ourselves some big time boost heading towards the triple threat for the World title. And once we've done that? If you wanna start throwing down right then an there? Well I'll be happy to kick your ass in front of your wife again.
In the end Alex, I'm just asking you to be a real MAN between the bells. Appealing to the side of you that is a competitor instead of a pouting lil bitch is the only card I have. Its the only thing I can think to play that might...MIGHT get you to get out your feelings an get ya head on straight! Because if you don't have my back? And I do fall to Avery an Gabriel? My record falls to one an one while you hit oh an two, and fans start to wonder if you're just a has-been that has a spot because of who he porks on a nightly basis.
He picked up his card. Javen looks at the card and then flips it over on the table. Come to find out all this time Javen had the Joker card.
Javen: Do what's right Alex, or be just another joker.
Fade on the image of the joker card.
Folks could there have been a better beginning for the Valentine Wrestling Syndicate? Could we have seen a stronger foundation of excellence lain for a new company? Honestly, we think not. Each and every match on that card was chock-full of high class competition! In fact if you look at the week in which "March Madness" took place for Valentine Wrestling Syndicate? You'll not find a better wrestling card out there. To paraphrase a big star(brother): Whether ya like it or ya don't, the VWS is the best thing going today!
Looking back now, "March Madness" as fresh in our minds as Fear The Walking Dead's 2nd season premiere last night, its clear to see that one match stood out above them all. Yes. We are indeed talking Javen versus Alex Jones. It was the main event of the evening! The match that was flashing on the marquee to entice the masses that hadn't already planted their butts in the arena seats. And folks that match lived up to everything we thought it would be!
Javen came out doing what he does, flying high, taking a beating, and still finding a way to press on. Alex Jones? Yawl that man is as legit as they come. He has a reputation of being one tough hombre himself. Take it from us, that is a well deserved reputation. Alex beat on Javen like the rainbow-haired warrior owed him money. Cunning. Jones was a cunning man; attemtping to use Javen's apparent infatuation with Ana Valentine to his advantage. But like we've said, Javen fought on. He managed to overcome the distraction and picked up the victory!
Yeah they say that you can't winn 'em all if ya don't win the first one....Guess ole Javen has a shot now don't he.
Or....Wait....Does he? This week on the debut edition of Tuesday Night Tenacity, Javen finds himself in a tag team match. And that's nothing knew to Javen. He's worked his share of tag matches over his career. But we, and he, can't help but be suspicious over the title of said tag team match: "Ana Valentine's Totally and Completely Fair Tag Match That Javen Can Win". Yeah. Uh huh.
*Insert an incredolus look right here*
Call us crazy here on Team Javen, but we ain't buying it when ya need to put it in a tag line that Javen has a fair shot. See nobody watching this is a fool. Everybody knows that Alex Jones has been blowing steam like an angry Fat Majin Buu ever since losing to Javen. Word has it that a Red lantern power ring skipped Alex because he had too much rage about that loss. So we know that he's gonna be looking for some real payback as soon as possible. Like...maybe...Tuesday night?
*Shrug*
Ask us, we think that at some point (if Alex even appears at all) Jones will abandon Javen to the clutches of Avery Miles III and Gabriel Ellis. Then after a valiant effort that will most likely prove futile, Javen will fall to the two on one handicap. Oh and then Alex will find the courage to run down and pummel the man.
Ok that's fine an all Alex. You an Ana are to be congratulated on this almost foolproof plan. But we recieved word for Javen earlier. He wanted us to make sure and remind yawl what one of the defining moments of "March Madness" was: Javen and Ana locking lips on the ring apron!
Folks enjoy this incoming Javen promo.
This late morning the scene draws open on a shot of Javen right away. He's hunched forward in a plain folding-metal chair, arms from his elbows to his wrists on a card table. In his hands Javen has grasped a singular, at our best guess, playing card. There's currently no way for us to tell just what card it is that Javen has in his hands. We can, though, see that Javen is eyeing his card intently. He almost seems oblivious to the fact his long, skittles-rainbow hair has fallen to either side of his face. To be honest its a lil bit questionable if Javen has even noticed the camera and its operator's presence.
After several, seemingly long, moments of watching Javen gaze at that card? He lays it face down on the table still denying us a glimpse of what it is. Seconds barely tick away before he's prying the top half of the card up again. Perhaps checking to see if it magically changed? Maybe Cris Angel is still about somewhere.
With a deep sigh Javen finally laid the card flat again. His gaze rising from the table and meeting the camera, finally.
Javen: Back on the first of this month.....April the first, commonly known as "April Fools Day"....the Valentine Wrestling Syndicate began building a legacy with its first pay per view event. Somehow...
Javen chuckled.
Javen: Somehow we managed to call the event "March Madness" and not get sued outta business by the NCAA college basketball people. Personally I think Ana Valentine's huge bosom had alot to do with it. But I digress from those massive topics for now. Back to the one I was talking about already; the building of this company's legacy. Ya see the fans who showed up at the T-Mobile arena in beautiful Las Vegas? They did not turn out to be hapless victims of a prank. Naw...
He shook his head "No".
Javen: Instead everybody went out there on that card and laid it out there for a chance at glory. The members of this roster beat the living HELL outta one another to start their careers here with a check in the win column. I may different in alot of ways from the vast majority of them, but wanting to be a success is one thing I can safely say I have in common with my peers. And so in the main event of "March Madness" I went out to the ring and I let this lil rainbow-colored light of mine shine!
Oh yeah folks, we all know that to be fact. Javen did just as he's done all his career, leaving no chance untaken in the quest for victory and entertainment of his fans.
He grinned now.
Javen: In the wake of my success I seemed to have made an April Fool of one mister Alex Jones; husband of the Boss Ma'am. See from what I gathered....after my head quit spinning and I could twist my back after that chair shot...
Did ya think Javen had forgotten that Ana? Trust us, he did not.
Javen: Seems that Ana an her lil snookum-wookums had a planned all worked out. Alex was supposed to make quick work of me and then go on to meet Gabriel Ellis for World championship in a few short weeks. Not to mention he was supposed to teach me a few random lessons in respecting our boss and his wife. Well folks if ya missed the pay per view; long story shortened down is that it didn't happen that way.
He holds up a finger an wags it back an forth.
Javen: That isn't saying that Alex Jones didn't bring it. Naw. Not in the least am I muttering that kinda lie. That man is a hard-hitting son of a bitch! Everytime he hit me it was what I'd imagine a jellyfish sting feels like. But at the end of the night.....When the dust settled....*I* was the victor. Not Alex Jones, but Javen!
Javen held out his left hand. Three times he slapped the back of his right hand against the palm of his left.
Javen: One, two, three and the ref was holding my hand in the air. After his flapping those gums about how he was gonna handle me and teach me respect? Alex Jones couldn't get the job done. Which by the way Ana was kissing me back in our lip-lock? Makes me wonder if the ring is the only place he hadn't gotten it done in that past twenty-four hour period.
There was a sly expression on Javen's face. The way they were positioned and the way the camera was? Who can really say if Javen is telling the truth? Yeah, of course, Ana would say otherwise. She couldn't just admit that she enjoyed a kiss from a man not her husband! Yo and maybe Javen was just stirring it up. Fact of the matter is we couldn't get a perfect shot. Think about it.
Javen: Ah but as is often the case for me; I seem to have really stepped into it this time.
Javen laughed again, though this one had more a nervous or anxious feel to it.
Javen: Couple weeks later and look where I've gotten myself huh? Yours truly got the win, made out with Ana, AND got added to the World title match coming up. True enough indeed. But I've found myself sitting all alone as "Public Enemy Number One" for the Boss Ma'am and her boytoy-hubby.
Words like this prolly aren't helping...
Javen: And now I find myself in a so-called tag team match. Folks a match, no less, in where my opponents are the incredibly talented Avery Miles the Third and Gabriel Ellis. Ha! Listen anybody who's anybody has heard about and googled an AM3 match lately. The man moves about a wrestling ring with the greatest of ease. Watching him do his thing is like watching Da Vinci paint or invent, its pure brilliance! And we ain't even made it to Avery's partner.
Lets talk a lil bit about Gabriel Ellis. This dude is seven feet tall, and rumor is that you can't teach that. Neither can you teach what he did at "March Madness". Stepping into the ring as one of five men in an elimination match? Its kinda ballsy accepting a challenge like that in the first place. I mean with the level of competition here? Just a single opponent is tough enough. But our resident giant Gabriel waded through FOUR to earn a spot in the upcoming World championship match. Including Duke Andrews who I've known personally for years, and Avery Miles.
A pause here as Javen begins to stroke his chin.
Javen: As great as my opponents are? Listen I *know* that this match is win-nable. Other guys who love to fly around? Psssh! My longtime fans know I'm cool with that. Its kinda my deal too. All the fans of the Valentine Wrestling Syndicate saw a taste at "March Madness". So I know good an well that I can best Avery.
Likewise, though I'm impressed by Gabriel, I am NOT intimidated by him. Yeah he's a big bad, ass-kicking machine! The guy might just stomp mud-ponds instead of puddles to walk dry. But I can deal with that. See ole A-M-Cubed is right that our business is not entirely a forest full of those big Ent-like bastards anymore. Still though I've dealt with enough of them in my time. I'll chop his big ass down like George Washington in a cherry orchard.
Javen was standing now. Yet after his boasting and bragging he looks down at his card lain upon the table face down.
Javen: But I ain't gonna lie to ya folks, this match is gonna be one of the toughest challenges I'll face from now til the end of my career here. See earlier I said this was a "so-called" tag team match. At this point I'm sure ya all know why I say that. I mean the silly lil tagline for the match itself? Look a blind man can see what the likely plan is. Alex, ya either don't show up or ya abandon me mid-match. I go on and give A-M-Cubed and the lost Ent a hell of a match. But being a realist at times I highly doubt I could overcome those odds. So once I'm worn down from facing two of our best, here you come charging down to get a lil bit 'o that sweet sweet retribution. Right Alex? Am I on the right track here?
He looked as if Alex would pop up an answer. It was ok that he didn't though. Javen was pretty sure of this. Plus if Alex did show up Javen would put him through the card table. But lets move on...
Javen: So....yeah, I'm boned in this match....
He reached out and put a finger on the card.
Javen: Unless! This one an only card I have here to play works Alex. See this card I'm playing its a man-card. If ya go rummage through Ana's purse ya might find yours somewhere in there. An I honestly hope that ya do Alex. Because ya see man this match is set up by yawl as a way to get at me, but it could cost you as well.
A nod.
Javen: Look at what happened at the end of "March Madness" would ya! You an Ana looked to cruise yourself right on into a title shot. However yawl got a reality check and found out full controlling interest wasn't in your favor. There's some more power players 'round here! And they're bound and determined to see that these great fans get the best they can have. Its what they deserve!
Now you can sit around and rest on your ass from what you've done elsewhere in the past....Coast along on your lil cushy reputation. Or you can man up! Take the balls out of your man-purse and stuff 'em back in your trunks! Show the fans just who the hell Alex Jones really is! For one night forget about our lil petty squabble, forget that I kissed your wife....and beat you....and got put into your World title match mathimatically lessening your chances of winning. Forget all that!
Javen made a motion as if wiping the slate clean.
Javen: Be a true blue competitor and for ONE night! Just a single night have my back in that ring. Be my partner and the two of us will soar to victory over our opponents. You an I can build ourselves some big time boost heading towards the triple threat for the World title. And once we've done that? If you wanna start throwing down right then an there? Well I'll be happy to kick your ass in front of your wife again.
In the end Alex, I'm just asking you to be a real MAN between the bells. Appealing to the side of you that is a competitor instead of a pouting lil bitch is the only card I have. Its the only thing I can think to play that might...MIGHT get you to get out your feelings an get ya head on straight! Because if you don't have my back? And I do fall to Avery an Gabriel? My record falls to one an one while you hit oh an two, and fans start to wonder if you're just a has-been that has a spot because of who he porks on a nightly basis.
He picked up his card. Javen looks at the card and then flips it over on the table. Come to find out all this time Javen had the Joker card.
Javen: Do what's right Alex, or be just another joker.
Fade on the image of the joker card.